I'm not gonna zap you. If you repeat things, then I'll just let Shadow do whatever he wants to punish me. It is kind of on me and he'd be right to be upset, its why I try not to.

[BUT SOMETIMES. THE THOUGHTS ARE HARD TO KEEP INSIDE.]

....what kind of punishment do you think Shadow would do?

...Eva, he would get mad and yell at me.

Maybe hit me.

Depends on what's said, but like Shadow isn't gonna go off the deep end. And even if he did, we have absolutely come back from worst. I almost killed him and kinda worked for GUN, I would have to work to go worst.

But most likely he'll just yell and shake me a bit. And even the yell is less yell as very, very, very intense eye contact with slightly raised voice.

And I trust you to keep confidence and that's why I'm willing to say stuff, because I trust you, and even the stuff I'm saying is more because I know why he's upset at the sharing and I can figure out what is the actually private stuff to keep to myself.

But if something happens, I'm not going to hurt you. I'm the one taking the risk. You're helping me sort out my feelings. I'll pay the price if it comes down to it.

It won't be the end of the world. [He nudges her calf.] I can have the hard conversations.

And I was wanting to befriend him when he was throwing me around like a ragdoll, so like I can deal with a mad Shadow.

...I mean, maybe, but I'm not going to yell at you either?

[He would take getting hit over someone being super mad at him too, tbh.]

I don't want you to be zapped for me.

[He is going to crawl up on the couch.]

Evangeline.

Eva.

Eva-eva.

Do not get self destructive to protect me from my own choices.

[Sonic is going to reach up and squish her face.]

Its not breaking my trust if you get mindcontrolled. Or compelled. Or whatever.

Its only broken if you make a CHOICE.

And that's why I trust you.

[Going to lightly boop her forehead with his before leaning back on the couch.]

And why you're not going to get punished if something else takes your choice from you. No punishments for things you didn't decide.

Good.

Also probably not good to prefer physical violence over like upset feelings, but that is definitely a therapist talk.

More like...

Its not normal for people to care about to want to physically hurt you.

It gets a little dicey when you can take pretty huge hits without problems.

But the yelling is 'cause its hard to deal with the emotion parts, right?

Yeah. Easier to take a hit, kind of worrying if that's what they WANT to do and think its good, and also you kind of should deal with the emotions of it?

Like when Shadow was upset at me before, he felt bad losing his temper and manhandling me. So I know if he DID hit me, its 'cause of his temper, and he doesn't want that to be the thing that controls him. But the conversation we had WAS important for him.